Squash Bowels: Grindcoholism (2013)

Surrender to Grindcoholism!

Review by joanismylover, the third metal attorney.

"Holy shit!" The Second . . . the listener is pounded with Squash Bowel's first full length since 2009, that's what she'll say. Especially since the release is from a band that's done splits with "Catasexual Urge Motivation" and "Cock and Ball Torture". If the utter Tastlesness of the names, song titles and cover art by most of these "artists" isn't enough of a put off, the music usually is. Or at least that's what one would expect. Maybe there is a Trap these bands like to play on the listener, hiding excellent, down-tuned, pummeling riffing over hyperblast beats without losing a sense of songcraft. Maybe The Theater of it all dissuades those of us not prone to grind and its porno sub-genres to ignore it and there's actually a whole bunch of new pornogrind records we all have to go out and get. Or maybe most of it is what it is - shit.

Ragehammer: War Hawks (Demo 2012)

Fury Death of Steel Witch™

Review by joanismylover, the third metal attorney.

I recall a review in Decibel many aeons ago regarding Iron Sword, I think. The premise was about the name. Alone, or in combination, the following words make a metal band name: sword, iron, fire, ax, steel, witch, blood, burn, coven, ceremony, ritual, fury, death. Add “rage” and “hammer” to that list friends. And while we’re at it, add “war” and “hawk” to it, as well. Ragehammer has hammered the metal rage into this ferocious five song “War Hawks” EP that you need to get right now.

Kingdom: Morbid Priest of Supreme Blasphemy (2013)

Lament for the Drummer

Review by joanismylover, the third metal attorney.

First Bill Ward is out of the Black Sabbath reunion, then Dave “Human Tornado” Lombardo gets booted out of Slayer regarding the age old business dispute over “accounting issues.”* Kingdom’s come and kingdom’s go. Metal is metal. Whatever happened to the drummer? Too many spontaneous combustions on stage? Too much carpal tunnel syndrome? Worker’s comp claims brining the metal drummer community down? Accept no drummer substitutes!

Kingdom need a new drummer. I really liked this release and wanted to like it more. There are some very cool moments on “Morbid Priest . . .”. The cover is cool, for starters. Old school hand drawn art with some skulls, horns, and demon winged dude in a cemetery. The guitar tone is good and the vocals not distracting. The songs are good and we even get some serious swagger on the Nameless King. That song definitely made me want to move and swing and bang my head. The whole album is short, and to the point, too. Kingdom has potential. But what’s promising on the otherwise cool album is dragged into an almost unlistenable zone with its ProTools sounding drums.

Deep Desolation: Rites of Blasphemy (2012)

Groovy

Groove metal is almost entirely an American phenomenon. Like most American-dominated branches of metal (e.g., glam metal, metalcore), it is largely derided by metal elitists. To be fair, they usually have a point. Even when it’s thoroughly infused with death metal (as with Lamb of God) there is definitely something too polished, too clean-cut, and generally too damn palatable about it.

Leave it to that bastion of metal awesomeness that is Poland to fix that. Deep Desolation’s Rites of Blasphemy quite literally answers the question, “What would groove metal sound like if the album cover was an amateurish drawing of hooded figures with a nude woman sacrifice?” I didn’t even know anyone was asking that question.

Hell United: Aura Damage (2012)

More Polish Death? Yes!

Just when I start to think that the Polish death metal scene has nothing different to offer, I come across something like Hell United. I’m not so sure about their name (is that the soccer team who play at Pandemonium?) but I’m quite sure about their music.

Let’s get this out of the way first: Yes, they do sound a bit like Behemoth. There are only two death metal licensing authorities in Poland, and that’s the one where these guys registered. But their sound is much more colorful than being mere Behemoth clones. Firstly, their sound is much more raw than your typical Polish death (and that hi-hat sound is beautiful). But their musical variety is more extensive as well.

Antigama: Stop the Chaos (2012)

Personally, I'm Progama

I really admire guys who can write cogent, meaningful reviews of grindcore albums. I simply don’t have the required skillset to pick out all the subtle differences as they flash by in 0:20. It doesn’t help that I’m grossly under-educated about the genre and have very little practice writing about it.

But when it comes to deathgrind, like Antigama, I’m a little more comfortable. Stop the Chaos is a 15-minute EP from the Poles. It’s my first experience with the decade-plus old band, but from what I gather, their recorded output has had a spotty reception. You’d never guess it from the confidence displayed on this EP.

Black Mad Lice: It's Going Deeper (2012)

Why does my scalp itch?

My favorite exchange in the Mel Brooks film Robin Hood - Men in Tights is where Prince John is talking to the witch Latrine, and he inquires about her name. She says she changed it. Incredulous, he asks, "You changed it to Latrine?" She responds, "It used to be Shithouse."

And so Black Mad Lice used to be Black Pocket Lice. As death metal band names go, it's still not that threatening, but at least it doesn't sound like some kind of weird Tamagotchi spinoff. For their first release under the new moniker, they are going deeper, presumably deeper into your scalp to avoid the effects of prescription shampoo.

Bloodwritten: Thrashin' Fury (2010)

Poland Is Awesome

Guest review by Metallattorney. He is the law.

I have always been shocked by just how good Poland's metal scene really is. Beyond the incredible Behemoth and pioneering Vader, Poland has also produced a wide variety of impressive metal bands. Bloodwritten is another name to add to the list.

Bloodwritten play fairly standard blackened thrash, but they play it with such emotion and rage that it is hard not to get swept up in it. Their sound is something of a combination of Sodom, Kreator, and Nifelheim. The music mostly consists of fast-paced, sinister-sounding thrash riffs and shrieking Mille Petrozza-esque vocals. The band catches the listener's attention early, with the album opening with the sound of a gun being cocked and fired. It immediately reverts to a state of chaos and whirlwind riffs from that point on through the end of the runtime.

Fanthrash: Duality of Things (2011)

Oldsters Return

Fanthrash's Duality of Things was released in July of 2011, the very tail end of the much-talked-about thrash revival. Or perhaps it was a year late for that particular revival. But it was still in time for the ongoing trend of old bands reuniting and giving it another shot.

They have a familiar story. Fanthrash was originally formed in Poland in 1986. They recorded a handful of demos before breaking up in 1992. In 2007, they returned, and still have three of the original members.

Centurion: Serve No One (2012)

Wal-Mart Employee Motto

With all the Polish death metal bands reviewed on this site lately, it's easy to lump another one into the "sounds just like Vader and Behemoth" pile. It's actually refreshing to lump one into a different pile of bands.

Centurion is a Polish death metal band out of Warsaw. They just released their second full-length this year, Serve No One, a decade after their debut. Instead of being Vader sound-alikes, they ape Suffocation's brutal-technical approach. And they play it well, with their modern production sounding akin to the New York band's more recent work. Since they copy Suffocation, and capably, they're awesome. No question of that.

KozybunX: Practice Room Demo.N (2011)

Kozywtf?

Guest review by Metallattorney. He is the law.

I have no idea what this name is supposed to represent. It looks more like someone's ill-conceived chatroom screen name than the name of a band. Furthermore, it certainly does not seem to be the kind of name a stoner doom metal band would choose. It seems much more likely to be chosen by a pop group or some other mainstream atrocity. But nevertheless, here we are, with KozybunX bringing some interesting Electric Wizard-esque psychedelic stoner doom.

KozybunX are a four-piece doom metal group who apparently recorded this demo in their practice room. Nonetheless, the production values are actually quite impressive. This sounds every bit as powerful and heavy as anything that the aforementioned Electric Wizard put out. The riffs are slow and muddy, just the way stoner doom should be. They have a very thick bottom end that gives the atmosphere a sense of gloom and desolation. The demo as a whole gives off a feeling of impending doom, which I guess is kind of the point of the whole genre.

Evangelist: In Partibus Infidelium (2011)

Have You Heard the Good News?

With the exception of one dude out in Ohio, everyone loves classic Candlemass. The Swedes were the first to adopt the distinct sound of epic doom: sparse, slow, heavy, depressing, and a little bit over-the-top. Their sound made them noticed. But the songwriting made them great. It was phenomenal, particularly on Epicus Doomicus Metallicus. "Solitude", if heard once, will stick with you until you die.

If a metal band is widely loved, then before long there will be countless imitators. And inevitably, many of those imitators will focus on the sound, forgetting the songwriting entirely. Evangelist have seen the current state of epic doom, in need of salvation. They are in partibus infidelium, in the place of the unfaithful. They're wearing suits, knocking at your door. They have a pamphlet, and want to talk to you about the Good News of the Church of Candlemass.

Embrional: Absolutely Anti-Human Behaviors (2012)

Not Fully Formed

Guest review by Patrick, proprietor of Beards Etc., home of metal, beards, and more.

Embrional are a Polish death metal outfit founded in 2003. Their second full-length album, Absolutely Anti-Human Behaviors, is set for release at the end of March. This record was my first exposure to the band.

Embrional take an atypical approach which sonically separates them from other Polish death metal acts. This divergence primarily lies in their guitar work. They employ a wide range of timing shifts, and many of their guitar riffs are peculiarly dissonant. Unusual chord progressions trade back and forth with the more standard death metal fare, giving the entire experience a somewhat experimental feel. The drums blaze away, providing a more conventional backdrop against which to set the guitar work. The vocals are solid death metal growls, though nothing terribly out of the ordinary.

Sphere: Homo Hereticus (2012)

Working Title: Going Through a Blasphemous Phase

Sphere’s Homo Hereticus is another submission by Godz ov War Productions. As opposed to my other recent Polish death metal review (Pandemonium), Sphere is more in line with what you expect. In other words, they’ve heard their fair share of Vader and Behemoth, and they’re not afraid to show it on their sophomore full-length.

You already know exactly what to expect from this band. It’s mostly fast-paced death metal riffs with a modern production. (What is it with Poland and modern production, anyway? Didn’t they get the “raw is better” memo?) The mix has everything exactly where it should be, and the band plays with precision and energy. The vocals are a hoarse death growl, somewhere between Nergal and your average Swe-death gut-belcher. In other words, pretty much exactly like Vader's vocals.

Pandemonium: Misanthropy (2012)

Furious Souls in a Chaos of Sound

A while back, Godz ov War Productions sent me the two-song 2010 promo from Polish blackened death metallers Pandemonium. It sounded pretty good, being a well-recorded but mostly un-produced demo from a long-established band that sounded like . . . well, they sounded like a Polish death metal band.

Color me surprised at how much better this music sounds on fourth full-length Misanthropy. It's no longer a band that sounds just like a mid-point between Vader and Behemoth. Instead, they've slowed things down to mostly mid-tempo, and worked on the production to get an eerie, otherworldly sound enhanced by the slight vocal distortion.

Death Denied: Appetite for Booze (EP 2011)

Review

The bassist of Death Denied contacted me about their EP Appetite for Booze. He identified their style as "unoriginal southern metal". I'm not sure if they have any idea how much I love southern metal. I haven't talked about it a lot, so they'd have to dig to figure that one out. In college I played the first few Black Label Society albums more than anything else, and Corrosion of Conformity's mid-period work wasn't far behind. I still occasionally break out Pride & Glory.

Submitting your music to a huge fan of the genre is usually a pretty safe bet. They're predisposed to liking you. But on the other hand, they've heard a lot of it, so if you're no good at it then you can get torn apart. And these guys are from Poland, so what the hell do they know about the original, southern branch of sludge metal?

Graveland: Cold Winter Blades (EP, 2010)

Review

Graveland is the one-man project of one Rob Darken. He is well-known in metal circles for espousing a racist, pagan weltanschauung and, to make sure everyone takes him and his ideas seriously, taking pictures of himself in the woods wearing Medieval armor and weilding swords. I've mentioned many times that I don't care about the political/religious persuasion of an artist, and that to me personally a racist worldview is somewhat less reprehensible than an anti-Christian worldview. So, let's get to the music.

Stillborn: Los Asesinos del Sur (2011)

Review

Poland is probably the most underrated country in all of metal. There's Behemoth, Vader, and Decapitated, but how many of the country's other 2,445 bands (per Metal Archives) can you name? And when a band comes out of the cold winters of a country that's been repeatedly trampled down in war simply because it's between superpowers, you can be pretty confident they're not going to fuck around with anything melodic or metalcore.

Stillborn fits perfectly with the no-bullshit metal traditions of that nation. Promotion company Godz ov War Productions sent me a review copy of the band's fourth full-length, Los Asesinos del Sur.

Entity v. Carnival Is Forever

v.

For this match-up, I toyed with the idea of bringing in Obscura for a three-way free-for-all. I also toyed with the idea of giving it a World War II theme, but perhaps it would have been in bad taste. Instead, I'll be comparing Origin's Entity to Decapitated's Carnival Is Forever.

Origin is from Topeka, Kansas, and Decapitated is from Poland. Other than that tidbit, the two bands have quite a bit in common. Both are technical death metal bands signed to Nuclear Blast, and both of them released their fifth albums in 2011.

Belzebong: Sonic Scapes & Weedy Grooves (2011)

Review

In case you couldn't already tell from their name, or their album name, Belzebong is a stoner doom band. What might be a surprise is, they're from Poland.

Sonic Scapes & Weedy Grooves is the first full-length from a band that's decidedly mellower than their countrymen Behemoth and Vader. If you've ever heard Electric Wizard or Weedeater, you're thinking exactly on the right track. It's fuzzier than Georgia peaches covered in hallucinogenic fungus, heavier than the Half Ton Man, and just as likely as him to get off the couch after eating said fruit.