Lightning Swords of Death: The Extra Dimensional Wound (2010) Review

The didn't quite have me at "hello". They had me at "Lightning Swords of Death". In contrast to Metallattorney, I think the name is excellent, and captures the spirit of the band well. Apparently they've been around for several years and have worked their way to where they are now: signed to Metal Blade and getting an excellent review from Decibel.

I'm not really sure what genre label to put on this. Black metal? Maybe--the excellent vocals are black metal, and they seem to draw from both the death-influenced Swedish school and the bombastic Norwegian one (see "Nihilistic Stench"). Blackened thrash metal? Sometimes--the title track definitely fits the bill, but as Metallattorney observed they're not so much about riffs as they are about atmospherics. Blackened death metal? Well, there are definitely moments, like "Invoke the Desolate One".

Whatever genre tag you want, they play a form of gritty, dirty extreme metal that has a purely American sense of simultaneous reverence and irreverence, equal parts love for the music and over-the-top self-parody. That's just the way I like it. Besides the band's name, look at some song titles to get a feel for their attitude.

"Damnation Pentastrike" is likely the highlight of the album, with its varying tempos, riffs, and great atmosphere. But even with the acoustic/atmospheric interlude "Zwartgallig" coming a third of the way in, there's really only one low point. That's the extensive ambient noise section in the middle of the closing track (I don't mind a little bit, but it just goes on too long).



The Verdict: This is very convincing extreme metal that draws from a lot of influences, and it's done well. Their American sensibilities and irreverent approach could make them more accessible to US listeners, a gateway into black metal for the budding extreme metaller. I give it 4 out of 5 stars.

WTF: Pop Sabbath Cover

And speaking of the relationship of metal to non-metal:

I've heard of metal bands covering pop songs, but this is the only example I've ever seen of the reverse happening. Apparently the Swedish group The Cardigans did this back in 1995. It's like they tried to drain all the blood and energy out of it--I guess I shouldn't expect to understand it--but it's nice to see the outside world give at least a nod to metal every now and then. Even if the last time it happened was 15 years ago.

True Metal vs. False Metal

A Critical Examination of Metalheads' Obsession with the Trve and the Kvlt, the Irrational Hatred for Anything Deemed False Metal--and Why We Should Stop the Crusade

Introduction

Perhaps more than any other genre, the fans of metal are obsessed with authenticity. What is "true metal" (or "trve metal")? What is "false metal"?

People make Youtube videos to explain their own opinions on what is true and what isn't, they go on discussion boards to shout their opinions all the time, and they make silly online quizzes to declare those who share their opinions as true and others posers. Even the musicians aren't immune, with Manowar leading their ongoing (and ridiculous) fictional war against false metal and Darkthrone warning the false to circle their wagons. As if they're going to come out and attack them.

Metal invites enthusiasm, and metalheads show it (nobody wears Lady Gaga or Dr. Dre t-shirts). That's why metal fans are the most bloodthirsty fans around, both in promoting what they like and in hating what they don't.

Ayreon: 01011001 (2008) Review

I've said many times that I'm not exactly a huge power metal fan, though sometimes I really like it. But Ayreon's 01011001 sounded like such an ambitious project that I had to get it.

It's two discs long, and features a total of 17 different vocalists, including such big names as Jørn Lande and Tom S. Englund. Each of them plays a single character in the concept album's storyline, which concerns a dying alien race somehow manipulating time in an effort to show Earthlings our fate so that we may avoid it.

Yeah. Maybe a little too ambitious. In the end, this is way more rock opera than it is power metal. There's very little metal to be had (you have to wait until the second disk before you hear more than just a breath of it), and every single track drags on far longer than it's welcome. This is bizarre crap, sci-fi sounding synthesizers and folksy flutes included.

Certain things should never be sung in the over-the-top power metal style; chief among these things is the mundane. Picking up fast food which is "finger lickin' good" (I'm not even joking) is not exactly a dramatic event. After the mundane comes the banal, like E=mc2.

In retrospect, it seems like a really bad idea, not just an ambitious one. To be fair, the vocalists are all quite talented, and they do a good job at what they are asked to do. But the Prague Philharmonic is talented too--and you would never want to hear them playing a Backstreet Boys song.

This is possibly the best track on the album:


The Verdict: I know someone who likes opera, campy movies, and sci-fi. I think this might be something he'll like, so I'll be giving this away. I give 01011001 just 1 out of 5 stars.

Necronomicon: The Return of the Witch (2010) Review

Necronomicon is a Canadian death metal band who've been around since 1991. I picked up their latest, The Return of the Witch.

Their sound seems to be mostly similar to Unleashed, but with influence from Nile and Dimmu Borgir. They sometimes use choirs for emphasis (see the opening track) as well as keyboards. These elements are perhaps best used on "Necropolis", an eerie and forbidding kind of track atypical of death metal. "The Time Is Now" has a clever guitar solo, and they threw in a drum-based interlude ("Lillith") about 3/4 of the way in.

Despite these few innovative moves, this is mostly generic death metal that doesn't really sound like it's from anywhere. At times, they're good enough to make originality unimportant--the title track and closer, for instance--but the rest of the time it's nothing to go out of your way to hear.



The Verdict: This is well-executed, but mostly typical, death metal. Failure to innovate has been a thorn in the side of the genre for some time now, with only a few (e.g. Gojira or Cynic) doing anything to move it forward, but nobody taking any cues from them. You could definitely do a lot worse than this one, so I give it 3 out of 5 stars.

Nokturnal Mortum: Weltanschauung (2005) Review

Nokturnal Mortum is a Ukrainian pagan metal band (i.e. black metal mixed with folk metal) associated with NSBM, and on the No Colours Records label. For those who don't know, NSBM is "national socialist" black metal (why the ideology dictates a different genre name, I'll never understand), and No Colours Records has often been associated with NSBM, though they seem to be indifferent to the ideology of the groups they sign.

I was intrigued by the sound of the band first, having never listened to anything which really falls into the pagan metal genre. After researching the band, I was a little leery of getting an album from a band which promotes these kinds of ideas. Then I smacked myself on the head. Who cares? National socialism is less offensive to me, personally, than some of the other things I listen to. Just because society as a whole has a special superhatred reserved only for racism doesn't mean it's objectively any worse than anti-Christian or any of the other multidudes of heinous ideologies.

The reason I won't buy Burzum records is because Varg Vikernes acted on his disgusting beliefs in contravention to law. Espousing them I can deal with. So I picked up Weltanschauung.

The black metal elements are mostly in the more ambient parts of the Norwegian style. Not bad at all, but what makes this stand out is the Ukrainian folk music infused throughout. It has a somewhat Oriental kind of sound to it, ironically (considering their own weltanschauung) conjuring images of gypsies, Arabs, and Persians, at least to my Western ears.

It's actually very good stuff, musically speaking. I don't recall understanding a word of the lyrics, thankfully, except for the title of one of the songs--much of it is in Russian and Ukrainian. The album is definitely NOT for those with short attention spans: it has a pattern of alternating between 1-3 minute ambient synthesizer/folk songs and 8+ minute metal songs, and the whole thing clocks in at over 74 minutes.



The Verdict: Actually, this is good stuff, if you can get past the NS taboo have a good attention span. I actually enjoyed the folksy interludes, as they tend to break up the album nicely, contrasting pretty with ugly. I give it 3.5 out of 5 stars.

Wintersoul: Frozen Storm Apocalypse (2010)

Wintersoul is a blackened death metal band from Great Britan that I discovered while reading MetalFRO's Rock & Metal Review. They sounded good, so I picked up their debut LP Frozen Storm Apocalypse.

England is not exactly known for its black metal, and Christian bands (like Wintersoul) rarely get it right, but this is convincing stuff. Maybe that's because of all the winter, frost, and ice references, but more likely it's because they're talented.

The sound is mostly a mix of two parts Behemoth to one part Dissection, with absolutely relentless (but memorable) riffs and drumming that alternates between mid-paced and brutal. There are some very nice Slayer-style solos, too (see especially "The Awakening").

The only time they let up slightly is on "Dark Winter Skies", and that is seemingly to introduce a very Celtic Frost element: ethereal female vocals. They are off-key, but in a compelling, very cold-sounding way, and show up numerous times on the album. The frontman is talented too, and tends toward a black metal voice with some death growling here and there.

MetalFRO noted some keyboards--outside the intro and outro, I didn't really notice them, so that's a very good sign.

My only complaint, really, is the production on the female vocals. They should be elevating this from "very good" to "freaking amazing", but they don't quite do that. They seem like they were mixed in as an afterthought, and they got lazy with it. They turned everything else down when her voice comes in, like a radio DJ talking before the lyrics start. The problem is most pronounced on "Shades of Terror".

Highlights include "Dawn of Ice Hearts", "Shadows of Death", and "Blood on Ice". As far as song titles go, they're pretty much one-note, but it's a good note.



The Verdict: Aside from poor production on the female vocals, everything about this is excellent, despite the unlikely source. It's going to give Norma Jean a run for their money on Christian metal album of the year, and I give it 4 out of 5 stars.

Shining: Blackjazz (2010) Review

Shining is a Norwegian avant-garde metal band with close ties to black metal band Enslaved. Their fifth album Blackjazz came out earlier this year.

Their sound is a bizarre mix of metal, jazz, industrial, and noise. They often use strange time signatures and abrupt transitions, but at the same time they know how to turn this collection of oddities into an excellent groove (see "Fisheye"). There is a lot of variety: Tracks like "Healter Skelter" really show off the sax, while "Blackjazz Deathtrance" is (like its name suggests) in the trance genre.

When it all works, it's excellent, like the opener "The Madness and the Damage Done, Pt. 1". Sometimes, though, it seems thrown together haphazardly (like their cover of "21st Century Schizoid Man"), and sometimes the tracks drag on too long ("Omen" or "Exit Sun, Pt. 1"). In all, though, it's much more good than bad, and you have to expect at least a little randomness in this kind of music.



The Verdict: Shining is a very strange band who have created a very strange and experimental album that's surprisingly listenable, though obviously not for everyone. I give it 3 out of 5 stars.

HAPPY 30TH ANNIVERSARY, MOM AND DAD!

My Metal History, Part 2.5: My Attempts To Play Music

Overlapping between high school and college I made some attempts to play metal music. Three of my friends and I had never played instruments before, so of course it seemed natural to form a band. Of course.

Two of them got guitars, the other got drums, and I got a bass. The guitarists and I played Ibanez, because that's what some of our main inspirations played at the time (especially Korn). We bought them in the $200 range, along with practice amps (although later on we would all get slightly better amps).

We were all self-taught, and had very little practice, so we never did get to be any good.

We practiced upstairs at the drummer's house, after covering the walls of the room with foam . . . as if that helped. We found tabs online, and the only song all of us ever learned to play was Danzig's "Twist of Cain." This was my suggestion, as the others weren't into Danzig like I was, but it won out over other suggestions because it was easy to play. To help them memorize it, I recorded cassette tapes for each of them with that song playing over and over.

Other than that, we started learning Megadeth's "A Secret Place," but never did get it down, and we also wrote some of our own simplistic stuff. The lead guitarist had some nifty multi-effect pedal, so one of our songs was three of us playing the same four-note riff over and over (very boring) with the lead playing weird stuff over the top of it.

I believe we only played one show, our high school talent show. We played both our simplistic song and "Twist of Cain." Because "Twist" only has a part for one guitar, the rhythm guitar player was supposed to handle vocal duties. Minutes before we were supposed to go on, he told me he had forgotten the rhythm of the vocals, and sang it to me all wrong. Whether he was faking it or if he had really lost it due to nervousness (he was always shy), he ended up playing guitar also and I had to handle bass and vocals. Since I had never done it before, it was difficult, but it would have been barely passable if I could have figured out how to face the mike while still playing.

Our band broke up at some point; whether it was after the lead graduated (he was a year older than the rest of us) or when we graduated I don't know.

The summer after my first year of college, another friend of mine asked me to join his band. He had stayed in town after graduating, and played with some younger guys; one was still in high school, one had just graduated, and I can't recall whether there was another one or not. Luckily, my friend played bass, and they just wanted me to handle vocal duties. Unluckily, my friend still wanted to handle the vocals he was already doing, so I ended up as a second vocalist with nothing else to do. Also, they leaned more toward the punk side of things and my voice has always been better suited to metal.

We did learn "Smells Like Teen Spirit" (not metal, but decent enough) along with a few other songs, including some originals. In one of those originals, my vocal duties included maintaining a single-note scream during the chorus (about 20 seconds or so). We played two shows, both with other (mostly punk) bands. One was in a local park and the other was at the county fair. After the county fair show, some kids came up to tell me that my sustained scream part was "awesome," and that I should have done all the vocals.

In my first or second year of college, I also tried to learn how to play a guitar I had bought for $7.00, and I continued to play bass during those years.

During my sophomore year of college, my friend and I practiced once or twice with a couple of Japanese students. It didn't last long, though, as we were practicing in the music building after hours (we weren't supposed to be there).

After that year, I sold all my equipment at a very cheap price to my bass-playing friend from the second band, and I guess gave it up for good. I took a piano course the following year, and wrote some interesting piano parts and some nifty midis (which I lost completely when my computer crashed). I would still like to get back into writing music someday, on the computer at least, because I think I have somewhat of a knack for that

For the past several years I have made no attempts to play my own music. I do, of course, growl/scream in the car, from time to time, and have perfected my death growl (no easy feat). I do a death growl, a black metal rasp, falsetto screams, and a vocal move similar to a cross between Wayne Static and Chuck Schuldinger.. If I ever get the time and opportunity again, I would like to find an extreme metal band which could use my abilities, but I guess I'll be happy whether or not that happens.