Tuesday, February 07, 2012

The Reptilians: The Mentalist (2010)

Clearing the Docket

The Reptilians are a band out of Idaho. They contacted me to review their record The Mentalist, available free on their web site. The music is a combination of Tool and Isis, which on paper sounds like something I should like. On paper.

Apparently, they believe that simply stretching a song out for a long period of time is something you should do. The record is one song of nearly a half hour, and it takes forever to go anywhere. When their aforementioned influences play long songs, they are songs that deserve to be that long. They go places.

As if being boring wasn't enough, they also decided to be annoying. They took Tool's trick of using the not-funny parts of a comedian's routine to try to make a point, and it just comes off as obnoxious. Sure, comedians often have good insights. But why would you sample them in a metal song? And if you're going to do it, why do it so extensively?

One final piece of evidence has been considered against the band. Their web site calls them "Idaho's Finest Pragueressive Applecore Meatal" [sic]. There are so many things wrong with that, I don't even know where to start.

The Verdict: I really expected this to go somewhere, and I listened to it several times before I was sure it didn't. That's why they weren't lucky enough to simply have a summary judgment. I give it 1 out of 5 stars.

1 comment:

  1. Badly written review, IMO... said nothing good about it. You should, at least, try to say something good about it. And what's wrong with minimalism?

    If anyone reads this, I'd take a listen before dismissing it based on the above review.