Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Tort: Tort (2012)

Sadly, Not a Concept Album about Medical Malpractice

Tort's self-titled debut is the final album out of three submitted to me by TotalRust. I question a few things about this one. First of all, their logo looks a lot like the Blair Witch's symbol, so I guess there's that. But mostly I question their name. I'm all about the legal thing--I am Full Metal Attorney, after all--but why name yourself after the term for a civil wrong? Were "Sin" and "Crime" too obvious?

Anyway, the Spanish band has a good sound. When you compare them directly to Weedeater, you'll see a lot of similarities, including the fuzzy, heavy sound and the raspy vocals. It illustrates how blurry the line can be between sludge and stoner doom, with Tort being the former, on balance.

Despite the good sound, and the TotalRust pedigree, this album just didn't speak to me. The record has dynamic tempos, with some slower tracks and some faster tracks. But the songwriting and riffwriting are generally forgettable and all-too-consistent from song to song. It sounds cool enough, but by the time the 41 minutes is up, you'll want to hear something different.

It was kind of nice to put my mental thumbtack in the metal map of the world in Spain. It's the only country I've been that wasn't represented in my music library. But maybe there's a reason Spain isn't known for its metal.

The Verdict: There's nothing in particular wrong with Tort. It's just in one ear and out the other. Good background music for weight training or beer drinking, as you prefer. I give it 2.5 out of 5 stars.

Buy Tort


  1. Spain has some good metal bands. Teitanblood, Proclamation, Machetazo, Dishammer, Looking For An Answer...

  2. Teitanblood is a name I've heard a lot. I may have to look into that. As for Looking for an Answer, I would have to hear a hell of a lot of good things about them before overlooking that stupid name. That's even worse than Today Is the Day.

  3. Teitanblood is definitely my favorite Spanish band.

    Tort is kind of a bizarre name. Malpractice would be better. It could be the name of a Carcass tribute band.

  4. Malpractice as a Carcass tribute band name: brilliant.

  5. I can think of few bands more fittingly named than Today is the Day, but to each their own I suppose.

    Teitanblood's Seven Chalices is a great album,murky, bestial black/death but with a really twisted quality to it that makes em stand out from the pack.

    Looking For An Answer is just good ol' fashioned crusty grind... again, the name makes sense when paired w/ the music.

  6. We're not a spanish band. Our country is Catalunya. We're a Catalonian band. NOT the same.

    You only write silly things about music, asshole learn to play a guitar and speak your shit after.

    Proclamation is a great band. shut your mouth.

  7. Sensitive, aren't you? I liked it, just not that much. Save the insults for someone who writes a really nasty review. Or keep them to yourself, and you'll make a much better impression.